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Searching for Clarity

by Existem

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    Limited run gatefold disc, featuring art by Spencer Chapin.

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1.
I’m searching for clarity I cannot seem to find my way I’m held in captivity A prisoner of the mind My rage is a symphony I cannot seem to comprehend Your captor’s mind He lives inside of your head Fight life and limb They sing the song of the dead Come now Leave this padded cell Choose now The tale you wish to tell I feel a new energy My feet have longed touch the ground A wave of serenity I’ve found a way to live again Its okay to be scared You’re facing the unknown It’s not your choice It's not your fault But make with this your own
2.
Crawling for the light Mouths are full of sand I can do this all on my own This pit is my home I fall back down This endless pit, it grabs so tight Pulling me under This blackened heart, repels the light Fighting for nothing Don’t try to save me I’m so close to death Please be my scapegoat Come not to wager But be met with debt Drain me of my passion I am so sick of hearing What’s possible I am fine Where is home, if not down here? Push and pull, no God, no fear Only in peace have I seen hostility Violence, growth, one in the same The light that comes down in to save me Is just a shadow in a new name Blinded by light Grown used to the darkness The shadows betray you You belong to me This endless pit, it grabs so tight Pulling me under This blackened heart, repels the light Fighting for everything
3.
Wander out at night World of fading light Disconnect from your world Find what nature holds Wander too close to the edge Cliffside starts to crumble and drop You vanish from my eyes As you begin to fall Search teams lose all hope Nothing left to find I wander out into the night I scream your name into the sky Let me bring you home Let me bring you home Finding you will be my life Now i know you're gone Let me bring you home to rest Reaching out Falling off the edge Reaching out Let me bring you home to rest I wander out into the night I scream your name into the sky Let me bring you home Was she even real
4.
Who We Are 04:37
I see the storm approaching Tomorrow in our hands The arrow leaves the bowstring A parting at a glance This time I hold my breath And I know who we are I see who you are This time I hold my breath And you let me in I know who we are I see who you are You are To me Without this I feel my heart knows Coming to terms And out of the shadows Understand me Align with us Together Two fades into one I know who we are I see who you are You are to me
5.
The Drowning 05:01
Lost in words, I cannot speak Lost in time, I cannot see I’m frozen here These empty bottles Haunting me I lie awake There’s only so much I can take I’m lost and all alone This place is not my home Lay your weary head down one last time Let the feeling die Look at you I’ve got you where I want you now You may have bested me this time But I hope you know that when you wake I’ll try again I’m lost and all alone This place is not my home Lay your weary head down one last time Let the feeling die Don’t hold your breath, I’m all you need Come back to me like your need to breathe You cannot leave, you belong to me Please don’t go, just drown in me I wish you’d sing to me forever But I know you’d hurt me one last time Pick up the pieces of this mirror Cut me, I’m alive Let the feeling die I’m lost and all alone This place is not my home Lay your weary head down one last time Let the feeling die Now my head is clear for the first time

credits

released September 10, 2021

Music and Lyrics by Existem
Produced, Engineered, and Mixed by Josh Barber at B24 Studios in Kansas City, MO
Mastered by Drew Lavyne at ALL Digital Mastering
Artwork by Spencer Chapin

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Existem Kansas City, Missouri

Originally forming in May of 2010, Existem have emerged as a progressive force in the Kansas City music scene, combining bursts of technicality, subtle progressions, ambient instrumental passages and jazz phrasing to express their unique sound.

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